9Now when He rose early on the first day of the week, He appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom He had cast seven demons. 10She went and told those who had been with Him, as they mourned and wept. 11And when they heard that He was alive and had been seen by her, they did not believe.
What's with these guys? Jesus told them at least three times that he would be raised on the third day. Here it is the third day. Mary came and told them that Jesus was alive, and they did not believe!
Note, it does not say that they did not believe her, but simply that they did not believe. I would almost understand it if it said they did not believe her. Being as she had had seven demons cast out of her before, hearing this impossible story from her now, they could have assumed the demons were back making her tell these outrageous things. But it doesn't say they didn't believe her. It simply says they didn't believe. Why couldn't they believe?
Sometimes it seems that these disciples were so dense! They walked beside Jesus, they heard Him preach, and yet when Jesus said something would happen, they did not believe when it did happen! Why hadn't Jesus been able to get it through their thick skulls?
Actually, I see this as a reminder to myself. How many times have I been told that my sins would be forgiven, and yet I wallow in sorrow for sins for which I do not feel I deserve forgiveness? How many times has Jesus said God loves us all and that He is always with us, and yet when things start going rough I get upset and wonder where God is? How many times has Jesus shown compassion, and yet when I do not get the answers I want to my prayers I question whether Jesus hears me or cares?
I can't complain about these disciples being dense or having thick skulls. For mine is just as bad. As with these guys, I need to get out of the mode of self pity, mourning and weeping, in order to see the miracle. Jesus said these undeserving, unexpected, impossible miracles will happen. And so they will.
Why did Jesus appear first to Mary? Why not first to His grieving disciples? Actually, I wonder if it has more to do with believing first. When Mary was told Jesus was alive, she was afraid, but she believed. When the disciples were told that Jesus was alive, they did not believe. In Mark 4:24-25, Jesus said "to you who hear, more will be given. For whoever has, to him more will be given". I wonder if because Mary believed first, she saw Jesus first.